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He asked if I was free and sent me an address, telling me to be down for anything. His father came to pick me up, saying my friend was working overtime and would meet me at their house later. Born and raised in the church, I was a minister by age 12, an elder by the time I was Eventually, I came back from New York to Atlanta and started my own interior design company. I had to clean up every Friday, cook Sunday through Thursday, work out Monday through Friday… if I broke routine, there was hell to pay. People had told me for so long that I was depressed, but I kept shrugging it off until watching a film that showed person after person described the same feelings I was feeling, arriving at the statement that these were the signs of depression.

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Three years ago, after moving to New York, where he then also lived, I found myself dangerously excited to hear from him one day — so much that I stepped away from the new boo to speak in private.

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I ended up there for three days straight, high. I got into therapy and started dealing with my issues, getting to the bottom of at what point I started to spiral. We started seeing each other every day and eventually moved in together. I remember throwing youth conferences twice a year that to this day give me chills to recollect — opening service to a church packed full of young people slain, in the floor, crying, worshiping, calling out to God so intensely the choir director said not a soul in there was seated. Three years ago, after moving to New York, where he then also lived, I found myself dangerously excited to hear from him one day — so much that I stepped away from the new boo to speak in private.

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I had to clean up every Friday, cook Sunday through Thursday, work out Monday through Friday… if I broke routine, there was hell to pay. A guy in the porn industry started calling about all these roles I would be perfect for. It was the longest two minutes of my life. He had to approve all my haircuts and clothes. But that visit was the first time I tried crystal meth and liquid G. Three years ago, after moving to New York, where he then also lived, I found myself dangerously excited to hear from him one day — so much that I stepped away from the new boo to speak in private.

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