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It is suggested that the use of gay apps, especially Blued, is popular among Chinese MSM and is associated with high-risk sexual behaviors and HIV infection. I was completely taken aback and didn't know what to say so I didn't mention it at the time but I keep thinking about whether I should. It's the same answer I give when someone asks me when a good time would be for him or her to come out to his or her family: As you can see there can be so many reasons your father downloaded that gay app. It makes sense that you think he might be struggling wi th his own sexuality. The aim of this study was to investigate whether there was a relationship between the use of gay apps and HIV infection and provide a targeted intervention to MSM. If they are not sure or have reservations, I guide them to consider as many possible outcomes as they can imagine, and then to try and be unattached to all of them.

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Begin by opening up about your own life and telling him some confidences and things you don't generally share with others.

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Chinese MSM who were over 18 years old and had self-reported homosexual intercourse in the past six months were interviewed in This might give him the confidence to confide in you and start tel1ing you some things if there are things to tell. You might even ask him why he doesn't ask you more about your gay life. If your father is doing this would you want to know that and would you ever believethat he isn't meeting anyone? Joe Kort for your one-on-one meeting Many adult men who were sexually abused as children return to the scene of the sexual crime by acting it out with men in their adulthood. I'm not sure I want to know the answer, especially if it has consequences for my parents' marriage.

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You would need to prepare for that response and decided if you could keep that to yourself. Dr Joe Kort is a licensed clinical social worker and board-certified sexologist. For reprint permission, contact us. This answer is simplistic and reductionist and doesn't leave room for the many variations of male sexual fluidity. I would too given that he doesn't ask you about your being gay, as well as your finding the app on his phone. Don't wait for him to ask you questions about it,just start talking. It makes sense that you think he might be struggling wi th his own sexuality.

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